So everybody raves about turning 21 here because it is the legal age for drinking alcohol and gambling. Besides 18, which is an official “adult,” 21 is supposed to be a huge milestone in your life. For me, it really wasn’t. There are multiple reasons, and I’m going to dive into them right now.
First of all, I was never really into the party, drugs, and drinking scene. Who am I kidding? “Never really?” More like, “seriously not.” It’s just not my thing. I would rather choose staying home and talking/gossiping with a few of my close friends sitting in a circle. Or playing cheesy card/board games with my sibling and cousins. Or watching a show/movie and cuddle up against my boyfriend.
As for drugs and alcohol, obviously it’s not legal for people under 21, but people still do it anyway. Not me, though. I’m just not into it. And it’s not that I was even specifically waiting to turn 21 before I could legally try alcohol. It was more like, hmm, I don’t really feel like I want to put alcohol into my system in order for me to have “fun.”
I will admit though, I do feel left out or awkward when everyone around me is getting ready to go clubbing or take shots of alcohol when I’d rather be somewhere else or just watch.
Of course, I’m not a simple “black and white” person, so I don’t have a firm stand on this whole alcohol situation for myself. I don’t see myself drinking to have “fun” but honestly if I end up trying a drink, I wouldn’t feel bad or feel as if I went against my own morals or anything. I considered trying a yummy, fruity drink for my birthday, but I ended up not doing it because it was expensive (I literally thought to myself, “Wow you can buy me food instead for that price!”) or the amount seemed too much for a first timer like me. After all, it’s my first alcoholic beverage, EVER. Don’t want any bad experiences.
So anyways, for my 21st birthday I didn’t even plan to do anything new and exciting (aka partying, clubbing, gambling, drinking), I just planned to go out with my boyfriend for a bit, and then have a nice sushi dinner with him and my family. However, that didn’t even work out. Sad, isn’t it?
When I first woke up, it felt great. My mom left me chocolate and a birthday card right outside my bedroom door. Eventually I got ready for my special day. I wore a cute dress. It was also a gloomy day and raining pretty hard early on (I hate rain), but I wore my warm rain boots. I tried doing my hair, but apparently was having a bad hair day and it failed, so I stuck with simplicity.
Mart took me out for bowling (it was hump day aka Wednesday, and so games were also discounted) which was great. Until I broke a nail of course, but it was still an enjoyable experience. Here’s hoping I don’t break a nail for the third time in a row the next time I go bowling.
We promptly came home to have dinner with my family, but it was rather strange. Nobody seemed to be dressed in nice clothing to go out to dinner. Plus, Mart and I were a bit tired from bowling. So we decided to kill time a bit and play a few games of Uno (a card game), in hopes that perhaps my family might be ready to go later. So time passes on by, and I get a little suspicious and worried. So I go to my mom and ask her if we’re still eating dinner. She looks at me with a confused look, and things crash and burn from there.
My brother and my dad – they already ate dinner, she explained. My heart sank. But I thought we were eating dinner together?
When my mom came home from work, she saw that I was out with Mart, so she “figured” I already went to eat with him. She assumed that I wouldn’t be waiting for them to eat dinner. It broke my heart, it really did. Why would she assume that? I asked her specifically when we should eat dinner for my birthday, even to postpone it to a later date if she couldn’t make it. But she refused and said, “We should do it on the right date, your birthday.” When I had asked her what time exactly, she said she was unsure because she would be working late, but it would be after she came home from work. So that’s why I killed time with Mart by going out and having some fun before coming home in the evening, when my mom would be home and we could all go eat dinner.
It sounds like a simple plan right? Well, apparently it wasn’t. And my mom just assumed that our family dinner meant nothing to me and assumed I wouldn’t be going to dinner with them. Even when I deliberately waited. Nobody had the right to assume that about me, especially when I had a freaking cell phone where they could simply call me and ask if we were still eating dinner. Why did nobody contact me? Why didn’t anyone care enough to ask?
It tore my heart into pieces and made me fume with fury. I sat in our living room where I left my boyfriend waiting, and cried. And then I cried in his car…for a long time, until he forced me to go to dinner with him before the restaurant closed. In the end, he took me out to the Japanese place I wanted to eat at.
We shared a “love boat.” It was $20 per person, but we felt like it was very worth it for the presentation and for all the food. There was tempura (like sweet potatoes, onion, shrimp, etc), teriyaki chicken, sashimi, nigiri, and california roll. The meal also came with a bowl of rice, miso soup, and salad with really addicting ginger dressing. It was very filling!
So all in all my 21st birthday was rather…interesting or uninteresting, depending on how you look at it and which event we’re looking at here. In all honesty, my family and especially my mother disappointed me a great deal. I hadn’t been in such tears on my birthday ever since my 18th one. But having my boyfriend really made a difference and it turned what could have been one of the worst birthdays I ever had into a semi-nice one. I’m very thankful for having him in my life and doing his best to keep me happy.
Besides all that I mentioned, I also felt very special throughout the week because of the many Facebook messages wishing me a happy birthday, and the various friends in my life who stopped by my house to give me gifts. They truly made me feel really special and remembered.
So…I’ve been 21 now for more than a week. I certainly don’t feel like it, as always with birthdays. But I hope I can continue to do my best in everything and grow wiser.